No, I DIDN'T Finish Issue 66

I am not worthy of being a writer. I haven't written a darn thing all week. Now the weekend is looming and I have three issues to get written, edited and sent to the editor. I am so disgusted with myself.

Is laziness in the stars? The moon? The seasons? In my head? Is it my lifestyle? Am I not taking this seriously enough? I haven't had any chocolate for awhile. Could that be the culprit? Whatever the reason, I must battle complacency and move on. I mean really move on. What is the use in setting goals when I don't really feel any accomplishment when I achieve them? What a whiny loser I've become.

As a manufacturer front line supervisor (yeah, I crashed into the glass ceiling very early in my career) I know all the buzz words about motivation, impacts of negative behavior, focus on the task, goal setting, importance of teamwork, blah blah blah and I use many of the techniques I learned on my kids with usually positive results. Why then, can I not use them on myself? Perhaps I'm on to the lie. Manipulation tactics have been used for centuries by an elite few over the masses. The Catholic Church has a tremendous amount of history on this if one is so inclined to read it for themselves. (Please don't email me about slamming the church. I attend Mass more often than half the Catholics in my parish so I don't want to hear it!)

Whatever the problem is I must find a way to solve it. I have deadlines.

I edited two senior thesis papers - one on the influence of the media on teenagers and one of teenage alcohol abuse. Both were very interesting. At first I didn't buy that this generation is more exposed to the "positives" of alcohol - i.e. makes you more grown up, looks cool, etc. - but the more I read the more I tend to agree. No one my age was exposed to Nelly in music videos surrounded by half-naked gyrating women, draped in all his bling bling, driving fancy cars and his hand wrapped around a cool drink. What teenage boy wouldn't want to emulate that? I'm not slamming the artist but it does make you wonder what message this is sending. But then again, I do recall Motley Crue's Girls Girls Girls. Maybe I'm just a dried up old prune out of touch with today's youth. Gosh I hope so!

BK